Seeking the best payday our heroes decide to pursue the bounty placed on Smilin’ Jack Hanover. His last known whereabouts being Chamberpot Alley in East Gordon. Halfling sisters, Lilian and Rio felt the best course of action would be to seduce Smilin’ Jack so they sought out a store that could outfit them on the cheap and found it at Creepy Pete’s. On the way to Creepy Pete’s, a beggar accosted the crew for a copper and a silver piece which Cobb graciously turned over currying him favor with the bums of Gordon (for better or worse).
Creepy Pete ended up selling Rio and Lilian some makeup and loaning them some sexy children’s clothes in return for a favor later. Meanwhile Cobb decided to honor Ildavir further by feeding the masses here in East Gordon. Escorted by Throdd, he brought a turkey to the first house. The tenants did not seem to appreciate Throdd’s brusque tone and not only did they not open the door to accept the food, they also attempted to dump a chamberpot onto Throdd’s head. Throdd responding by hurling the turkey at the tenant which caused her to begin yelling for the city guard. Cobb and Throdd beat a hasty retreat to catch up with the others.
Venturing further into East Gordon toward Chamberpot Alley, Lillian and Rio were accosted by some dangerous looking fellows in an alley. Seeing as how the halflings had already put on makeup and dressed in the sexy clothes provided by Creepy Pete, the citizens misconstrued their intentions and assumed they were for sell (or free with some aggressive motivation). The fight started off with Lilian getting her weapon caught up in the tassels of her newly acquired outfit and Rio getting popped in the head with a blackjack. A thrown dagger between the ribs of the assailant courtesy of the unnamed thief ended the fray as the other two goons took off down the alley. Lilian and Rio decided to strip the guy to cover up a little bit better while the unnamed thief looted the body and attempted to pin the death on the Carnoli Mob.
They finally arrived at the hovel of Hanover and after a brief scouting of the area around the house, decided to coax Jack out. After a seductive attempt to lure him out courtesy of Lilian and a more forceful approach courtesy of Throdd, Throdd decides to smash in the front door. After smashing it in slightly but not enough for it to open, Lilian tries the handle and the door opens quite easily.
Inside the shack had been ransacked, with no sign of Jack. The crew does spot a very expensive piece of fabric that was ripped off onto a nail and find a trapdoor leading 10 feet down into a hand dug tunnel.
Limboing crotch-first through the tunnel, the unnamed thief emerged into a large sewer duct quickly followed by the rest of the crew. They hung a left and began walking down the sewer walkway for some time before a giant waste centipede erupted from the river of poop! The unnamed thief continued walking on while the other four engaged the creature. Rio smacked the creature in the gullet with a “rock” while Lilian missed and threw a spear into the river. Seeing an opportunity for glory Throdd pitched himself onto the back of the hideous beast! The beast answered in kind by throwing itself at Rio using Throdd as the meatshield. Seeing her opportunity then, Lilian jumped onto the front side of the monster and stabbed into it. During the fray, Cobb was calling upon the power of Ildavir for protection and healing. Rio swung wide and accidentally hit Throdd with another “rock”. Then with a mighty yank, Throdd beheaded the beast or whatever (the thing didn’t actually have a head per se). As penance for the party foul, Rio rooted through the top portion of the poop monster, found a giant ruby and turned it over to Throdd. Lilian cut off chunks of the beasts carapace for later.
Throdd and Cobb decided to catch up with the unnamed thief who had by this point found a ladder going up out of the sewer. They emerged into a very fancy looking foyer. The unnamed thief immediately rolled up the fancy looking carpet to take. Throdd then immediately used said rug to wipe the feces and centipede ichor from his body. They went through the door and emerged into a very high-class bordello. After an exchange with Big John, the proprietor of the establishment (and a subtle casing of the joint), our heroes discerned that the scrap of fabric was more than likely Big John’s and also that this establishment wants him dead.
Meanwhile Lilian and Rio walked about a half mile further into the sewer to find the rest of the centipede and they found it bunched up against a grating halfway blocking it up. They fished it out and unblocked the grating. Lilian hacked off more parts of the creature and found some more coinage in the carcass.